I just came across this film called Being Dad. It looks like a wonderful affirmation of fatherhood including the fear, joy, humour, and inexperience of becoming a dad. I’d love to see the whole film - nudge nudge Mary-Lou! Here’s the trailer:
Wednesday 20th May
Yesterday we went back to Stanley Park to go on the Miniature Railway and to the Childrens Farmyard. Toby was excited when we were on the miniature train which Mary-Lou also enjoyed greatly. I liked the animals in the farmyard which included alpacas, llamas and bunny rabbits!
On our way out of Stanley Park, we stopped at a bicycle rental shop to ask about when we rent them. They don’t attach buggies to Tandem bikes so we would have to have 2 seperate bikes, but Mary-lou can’t ride a bike. However, she had a go and did really well. She and I were both very pleased and proud of her!
Today we went whale watching. It was amazing! Killer Whales are actually Dolphins, I didn’t know that and was a bit disappointed to learn so! We took a boat from Granville Island and it took 1.5 hours to get the whales, then the boat engine broke, so we were floating around for an hour while the guide tried to entertain us with stories and books about Orca’s. The captain managed to fix the engine and we headed back to the whales and saw one breach (jump out of the sea), Mary-Lou was so excited. Because the engine wasnt working propetly it took 2.5 hours to get back and they took us to Stevenston harbour where we got taxi’s back to the house. We got in tired but happy at 9pm.
—
This is part of my Vancouver holiday journal. To see all our holiday pictures click here for our Flickr set.
Monday 18th May
Ulrike and Craig were with us yesterday and we all went to Granville Island Market. The Public Market is very big and exciting with all sorts of fresh food. We also saw live crabs and a live Lobster waved at Toby!
One public performer at the Market did juggling on top of a stack of a box, a stand, another box and a skateboard. I found him quite funny and his mannerisms reminded me of an old friend, Isaac. We all went to Bridges for lunch which was very nice then Craig and Ulrike bought some food for our English Breakfast dinner later that evening which was yummy!
Today has been a “mooch” day. Ulrike and Craig left this morning so we went up to Commercial Drive to have a mooch around. 
We had lunch at a Carribean place called The Reef. Mary-Lou REALLY enjoyed her dish, but I didn’t think the flavours of mine went together. Toby just ate his without fuss, as usual! Then we went shopping for some more stuff and came home to watch the finale of 24 in the evening! A nice relaxing day.
—
This is part of my Vancouver holiday journal. To see all our holiday pictures click here for our Flickr set.
Saturday 16th May
We went to the Museum of Anthropology this morning - it was a BIG dissapointment! It is undergoing expansion so they’re charging half price, but the museum is very small. It is trumpeted as a highlight on Vanocouver but it really isnt. I was expecting something like the Natural histroy Museaum in London and I was looking forward to learning about the history of the First Nations in Canada, but all it had were lots of totem poles, nice as they were! We then tried to find something to eat and ended up eating a Subways sandwich in the Students Union of the University of British Columbia - not one of our best meals!
Afterwards we took a bus to Kitsilano and walked to Kitsilano beach which was nice with great views. Toby didn’t like dabbling his toes in the sea, but he did like the swings in the park! We took a walk around the Kitsilano pinicula with great views of the tall buildings in downtown and walked over Granville bridge on our way to “nu”, a nice restaurant which we felt very under-dressed for! Before we got to “nu” we took a rest in a park where I lay down for a rest and Toby enjoyed watching some cute dogs play.
This morning we headed to Stanley Park to go to Vancouver Aquarium. It was really awesome compared to the Museum of Anthropology! We all really enjoyed watching the fish and turtles and sharks and Dolphins and Beluga whales and everything else. The new baby Beluga snorted water over Mary-Lou, which is quite an honour!
Afterwards we went to Commercial Drive to get some food for us and Ulrika and Craig who have come this evening for a couple of nights. I’m looking forward to learning a bit more about living in Canada from them.
—
This is part of my Vancouver holiday journal. To see all our holiday pictures click here for our Flickr set.
Thursday 14th May
It was a long, long journey from Manchester to Vancouver. A Flight to Amsterdam, then Minneapolis then on to Vancouver. Toby was wonderful during the journey, he didn’t moan too much and was jolly most of the time. I was a bit nervous of flying, particularly the take-offs and landings, so I carried a bar chart of the deaths per billion kilometers from the different forms of transport from a New Scientist article. It showed 0.1 deaths per billion km for airplanes, somehow it made me feel safer!
When we emerged from the cloud layer on our approach to Vancouver Airport, it was night time and the city lights looked very clear and sparkly. The sight raised a feeling of excitement and the hope of something new in me. We got a taxi to the apartment through East Hastings, which is where the homeless and addicted hang out. Even at midnight there were alot of people on these streets and we past a few Salvation Army centers and other charities.
The Apartment we are staying in is very swish and not very baby friendly. It has been done up since the photos on the websites were taken which is a bonus. It feels very comfortable and homely as well as luxurious and special.
On our first day, Wednesday, we chose to mooch and walked to Commercial Drive to see the shops and cafes that Deanne (the owner of the flat) has recommended. We had breakfast at a great cafe 
called Uprising Breads which is a bit like Unicorn, they make and package all their own products, mainly baked stuff like bread, cookies, muffins, pies, etc, all organic - Mary-Lou loved it! In the evening, once Toby was in bed, we snuggled and watched the LOST finale which was AWESOME!
Today we took a bus into Downtown and walked up Robson street, the main shopping street. We ate lunch in a nice restaurant called BREAD GARDEN then walked down to the north shore. The Mountains are so beautiful to look at and we felt safe and comfortable in Downtown. Vancouver has no litter, it’s lovely!
—
This is part of my Vancouver holiday journal. To see all our holiday pictures click here for our Flickr set.
Special with Mary-Lou, Toby’s mornings, growing out of clothes, baby groups, Mary-Lou’s thoughts on Amy, time with Mary-Lou’s parents, injections, puking, raising boys, male mentoring
Download Episode 17
To hear The Daddy Diaries before they are put on this blog and to download them automatically you have 2 options. You can Subscribe to The Daddy Diaries in iTunes by clicking here, or you can subscribe to the podcast feed by clicking here.
Mary-Lou and I are well into LOST and are working our way through the 4th Season at the moment.
This is a great video about how they came up with the title music. You might be a bit lost if you haven’t seen LOST.
Feeling tired, broken monitors, Toby reminds us of Amy, grief so far, smiles and baby noises, Nando’s and Raising Boys.
Download Episode 16
To hear The Daddy Diaries before they are put on this blog and to download them automatically you have 2 options. You can Subscribe to The Daddy Diaries in iTunes by clicking here, or you can subscribe to the podcast feed by clicking here.
Coming home, remembering Amy, visits from family and friends , bathtimes, real nappies, a routine, Toby’s weight, feeling safe, weekly baby activities.
Download Episode 15
To hear The Daddy Diaries before they are put on this blog and to download them automatically you have 2 options. You can Subscribe to The Daddy Diaries in iTunes by clicking here, or you can subscribe to the podcast feed by clicking here.
Toby’s here! The story, The West Wing, 7 hour wait, stressed and frustrated, a rush to the theatre, thinking of Amy, the operation, Toby arrives, “huge and chubby”, 8lbs 5oz, skin to skin, my parents arrive, leaving too soon, lovely time today, friends visit, haven’t yet cried, changing first nappy, new grief.
Download Episode 14
To hear The Daddy Diaries before they are put on this blog and to download them automatically you have 2 options. You can Subscribe to The Daddy Diaries in iTunes by clicking here, or you can subscribe to the podcast feed by clicking here.
Mary-Lou and I went into St. Mary’s yesterday afternoon thinking we were to have the c-section at 9am this morning. But after 7 hours waiting, we finally had our beautiful boy, Toby Jacob Gibbs at 4.38 pm this afternoon! He was 8lbs 5oz, chubby, hairy and cute!
Here is his Flickr Photo Set, and here are some pics to introduce him:
The day before the caesarean, surprised by optimism, praying with Mary-Lou, a Christian struggle, crying with grief, daydreams, Wall.E, stay tuned!
Download Episode 13
To hear The Daddy Diaries before they are put on this blog and to download them automatically you have 2 options. You can Subscribe to The Daddy Diaries in iTunes by clicking here, or you can subscribe to the podcast feed by clicking here.
Mary-Lou and I went for another scan yesterday and another meeting with the consultant where a cesearean was booked for the 1st April at 9am!
We’re both feeling excited and relieved that we now know the date and that it was the date we wanted.
In 10 days we’ll have Toby! We’ve already got the Nursery ready for him and Mary-Lou finished work yesterday so is now washing all the baby clothes we have bought and have been given. It’s becoming more real!
I think I’ll get nervous about the operation and whether Toby will survive over the weekend before he arrives. But at the moment I’m too busy with work to let those fears sink in.
36 weeks, Baby-proofing Your Marriage, A friends response to Amy’s stillbirth, Mary-Lou not sleeping well, day-dreams.
Download Episode 12
To hear The Daddy Diaries before they are put on this blog and to download them automatically you have 2 options. You can Subscribe to The Daddy Diaries in iTunes by clicking here, or you can subscribe to the podcast feed by clicking here.
Feeling stressed and angry, 6 weeks to go, visualising Toby, Junebug - a film which deals with stillbirth, being away for 2 nights, Toby licks the back of his hand.
Download Episode 11
To hear The Daddy Diaries before they are put on this blog and to download them automatically you have 2 options. You can Subscribe to The Daddy Diaries in iTunes by clicking here, or you can subscribe to the podcast feed by clicking here.
Budgeting, buying things, earning enough, latest scan, caesarean dissapointment.
Download Episode 10
To hear The Daddy Diaries before they are put on this blog and to download them automatically you have 2 options. You can Subscribe to The Daddy Diaries in iTunes by clicking here, or you can subscribe to the podcast feed by clicking here.
I’m getting alot of people looking at the The Daddy Diaries category of this blog. Tommy’s, the baby charity, have linked through to my blog and www.askamum.co.uk have begun adding my podcast to their audio resources.
My wife, Mary-Lou started a blog a few months ago to talk about life after Amy died. I’m pretty sure alot of people coming here would be interested in her thoughts too, so click here to see her blog.
Third trimester yet?, caesarean or vaginal delivery, hopes & dreams for Toby Jacob, dad books, Toby skateboarding and imagining Amy.
Download Episode 9
You can Subscribe to The Daddy Diaries in iTunes by clicking here, or you can subscribe to the podcast feed by clicking here.
Christmas Eve & Christmas feelings, Toby is “viable”, 30cm rulers, More kicking, Guess How much I Love You, Mary-Lou gains 1 stone.
Download Episode 8
You can Subscribe to The Daddy Diaries in iTunes by clicking here, or you can subscribe to the podcast feed by clicking here.